We All Need Rest

There are many types of leaders and most must take time away to be refreshed to continue the charge.

As men, we tend to think we have things under control. We don’t know how to ask for help.

This holds true for many men in Christian leadership, as well. We feel if God called us to lead men He must clearly trusts us meaning we need to suck it up when we get weary.

He tells us, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others .” (Philippians 2:4) With that can promote a lot of pressure. If not careful, we can tend to take on others’ burdens.

God also reminds us to, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11). We tend to put others’ needs before our own.

We forget that Jesus periodically went off on His own to pray. He took time for rest and reflection so He could continue His mission.

When tending to your sheep “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.“ (Philippians 2:3) I know you are doing just that. I simply want to remind you to take care of yourself too.

Jesus also instructs us to, “Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood. (Acts 20:28)

It’s okay to rest gentlemen. Jesus says to us, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” (Mark 6:31)

God has you! “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (Isaiah 41:10)

Let’s not forget to lift each other up and ask for encouragement when we need it.

I thank God for you men. Just knowing you are out there leading other men helps me know I’m not alone. You aren’t either.

I thank God we have each other. I will be praying for you.

Be encouraged brothers.

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Please… Do Not Fly Solo

February 19, 1993 I surrendered my life to Christ. That is more than thirty years ago. Wow! How time flies.

How? I went to a men’s retreat. Hungover. Yes. I was a big drinker. For more than twenty years before my surrender I drowned my fears and failures with alcohol.

I had totaled three cars in those twenty years and I was court ordered to Driving School twice due to multiple DUIs.

It was only through God’s grace that I did not kill myself. Or worse. Killed someone else.

The miracle in my surrender was how Jesus immediately took my addiction away and He set me free through His grace.

I was now longer desiring beer which was my alcohol of choice. I was able to drink it, but I found myself only getting halfway through. I no longer felt it was a sin to walk away.

My insecurities were still intact, but I was no longer able to numb my pain with a six pack.

In its place God put a five pack of men in my path. Geoff, Bud, Jim, John and Tony all encouraged me and walked me through bible verses giving me the courage to walk with Jesus. Pretty soon I was sipping on His Word every day and growing in confidence.

It was God’s grace and love through this band of brothers that I have a relationship with Jesus today.

Thank you Jesus and thank you to the men that invited me thirty years ago to that Men’s Retreat.

It is because of you five men that today I pray every man finds a brother in Christ to walk this journey with. Jesus wants you #freein23

Men… there is no reason for anyone to fly solo. God wants you as a pivotal part of His plan. He doesn’t want to see you get picked off in the dark.

Get plugged in. Find a group near you at http://www.Facebook.com/GodsCarolinaMen. #aimingtoconnectmen

It could save your life.

http://www.facebook.com/GodsCarolinaMen

Lord, I Need You

This post is designed as a devotional.

I surrendered my life to Christ on February 19, 1993. I showed up at a men’s retreat hung over and God freed me from alcohol that night. He did not free me from numerous other addictions. For reasons He knows better than I do. Most likely to insure I never forget that He loves me and wants me to always rely on Him.

Lord. Thank you for Your promise to give us rest. I am weary from trying to face my fears on my own.

Please help me face the demons in my life that I have been tolerating for as long as I can remember. Demons that I have allowed to derail Your plans for me. Teach me to leave them at the foot of your cross. And leave them there.

Thank you Lord for Your promise to preserve us in Matthew 11:28 telling us, “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

Thank you Jesus for Your invitation to learn from You and Your promise that Your yoke is easy and Your burden is light.

Thank you Jesus for inviting me to come to You. Not to religion. But to You so You can teach me Your ways. Amen

Scripture

Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11:29

Reflection

All of us need rest, and Jesus promises to give it to us when we find our rest in Him. He will not scold us for being weak or scorn us for being foolish. He promises to gently and humbly refresh our weary souls. The Charles F. Stanley Life Principles Bible

Breakdown

What Kind of Rest Does Jesus Give? Desiring God

Prayer/Meditation

Guided Prayer & Meditation. Matthew 11:28-30 The Meeting Place

GOING DEEP

Message

Matthew 11:28-30 (Part 3) Calvary Chapel Ontario

Worship

Come Unto Me Esther Mui

Lord I Need You Matt Maher

Come To Me (Live) Bethel Music

Give Him A Call

It has now been 24 days since North Carolina issued their “Stay at home” order that has quarantined more than 10 million people. (Stay at home orders by State)

My wife and I have been honoring that order even though we live just over the border in South Carolina.

Our church in North Carolina has been streaming every Sunday for four weeks now.  I thank God for their service. It has been a technical challenge for the Pastors and the Worship Team, but they have been dedicated including Easter Sunday.

Communion Service at home. (Click on image and advance to see how the elements were administered)

Some would say we are attending the Church of the Living Room. Some of our friends may be going to St. Mattress of the Springs or Bedside Baptist.

Is it real? Yes… different, but this is our new reality.

It has been weird not being able to fellowship with our friends at Steele Creek Church of Charlotte. Being as relational as I am, I miss it.

Some folks are keeping their home groups intact by meeting on Zoom. Some are doing bible studies by way of video conferencing. That’s impressive.

Our home group hasn’t met since mid-March. I miss them.

This is a weird time. It is easy to become so isolated that you forget there are other people out there.

Our friends become characters on TV like; Hotch from Criminal Minds and the Reagan family on Blue Bloods.

Our perspective of the world is blurry. Our sense of reality is not real. It feels like we are living in a bubble.

How are you surviving your quarantine? How are you spending your time? Who are you connecting with?

Even my time with God has dwindled. You would think that since we are sequestered to our homes that we would spend more time with Him, but it is really easy to fall into the traps of the enemy through distractions like Netflix and games on social media or our phones.

A friend of mine put it beautifully in her blog entitled Call Waiting. A graceful reminder that God is always available through prayer.

My prayer today is that we all find time with God. He is not punishing us with this plague. He really just wants to spend time with us.

Give Him a call.

Reach Out And Post Somebody

What are you doing to stay connected?

The Coronavirus has forced us all into isolation, but there are some great ways to connect through social media.

We are living in a time of quarantine yet the world seems so much smaller. Everyday people are reaching out looking to play games, have some fun, and give a perspective from their windows.

Gaming

Did you know that the World Health Organization is encouraging people to play video games amid the coronavirus pandemic?

Here is an article from Parade.com titled The 22 Best Online Games to Play With Friends During the Coronavirus Outbreak. You may have some of your own that you can recommend in the comments.

Fun Interaction

I have received invites from friends to do everything from photo challenges to online trivia contests.

There are suddenly a ton of quizzes to challenge you or you can list the Top 10 celebrities you have met.

What are you doing for fun these days?

Your point of view

One of my favorite activities that has come out of our captivity is how neighbors are connecting by singing out their windows.

Others are posting photos to share their view from a window.

Music

I love music and it has been a wonderful distraction from our “Stay at home” lives.

Everything from recitals to benefit concerts are being used to help lift the spirits of all of us.

Food

A lot of people find comfort in food.

Other than pictures of their pets, I think most of us post more photos of our food than anything else. This is a pre-COVID19 phenomenon that will probably out last all of us.

I am guilty of this and it drives my wife nuts. I’ve shared everything from my banana bread, chicken enchilada and peanut butter & jelly sandwich recipes to donuts.

Connecting

Online meeting places like Zoom and GoToMeeting are getting very popular for gatherings other than work.

One of my friends is participating in a bible study using these platforms. Some men’s groups gather for fellowship through their laptops.

There’s no wrong way

Social media is a great way to stay connected with friends and family. For example, before the quarantine I was meeting regularly with my nephew through Skype. He was stationed in Japan.

We are designed for fellowship

God created us for fellowship. God created Adam because He wanted to share the world with him.

Do not let COVID19 isolate you more than it already has. Reach out to someone… Family… Friends… A church…

Who are you connecting with?

Empty Parking Lots

Easter Sunday is here and we are all in our homes… alone…due to the Coronavirus. Or so we feel.

Our church parking lots are empty, but remember, so is Jesus’ tomb.

Easter reminds us that He is alive and because He is alive, He is with us every minute of every day.

To help you with that reminder, here are a few songs that I find helpful to renew my spirit. Listen to my Easter Playlist or find your own mix. Just don’t let the enemy tell you no one cares that you are home alone. That is a lie. We are all here together… in Spirit and in His Truth.

Today is the most important day for a Christian. It is because He rose from the dead that we believe. Otherwise we are just another religion.

If you are not a believer that Jesus died for you and that he rose from the dead, please consider reading the Book of John.  Here is a good summary in two parts (Chapter 1-12 and Chapter 13-21). If nothing else, remember that he loves you and always will.

These songs are not listed in any particular order. Enjoy these individually or listen to them on my Easter Playlist.  Note: If interested, check out my Music Playlist for other great Praise & Worship music.

The Lord’s Prayer performed by Andrea Bocelli

 

Forever performed by Kari Jobe

 

We’re You There performed by Michael W. Smith

 

Glorious Day performed by Casting Crowns

 

Because He Lives performed by Alabama

 

He Is Alive performed by Third Day

 

It Is Well performed by Kristene DiMarco

 

What A Friend We Have In Jesus performed by Larry Ford

 

All My Hope performed by Crowder

 

Jesus Paid It All performed by Newsboys

 

Thank you Jesus for sacrificing Your life on the cross, delivering us and by doing so insuring we are never alone.

Wiped Out?

Have you had any luck finding antiseptic wipes? It seems that nobody is right now.

I need to go back to work to apologize for criticizing them for not providing cleaning solutions for their front-line workers. Their recommendation has been to use hand sanitizer with a paper towel.

The sad reality is that paper towels are scarce too so some workers are resorting to wiping down their work stations using printer paper. Really?

Hand sanitizers have become so valuable that we are being directed to lock them up before walking away from our posts.

 

The Coronavirus is winning the war on yet another front.

Every grocery store I have gone to has been out of stock. The store clerks tell me that shoppers are at the door every morning when they open up. These people then proceed to clear out their stock of toilet paper, paper towels, Kleenex and antiseptic wipes.

All of the pharmacies including Walgreen’s and CVS cannot keep them in stock either.

 

There are a lot of posts when you search the Internet for “antiseptic wipes,” including a number of advertisements. The problem is availability.

The top AD on Amazon’s website is a 60-pack for $8.80. It appears to be “In Stock,” but the only shipping option is Standard and the estimated delivery is May 6 through the 28th. I could be contaminated by then.

Amazon does offer a 20-pack of antiseptic hand wipes for $2.43. Great price. The problem is they will not be in stock until May 26. That’s six weeks from now. I could be dead by then.

On the same 60-pack on Amazon the seller is noted as Suxman-US. I was unable to locate their website. All of the findings when searching this company point to Amazon. Is this what a hamster’s life feels like?

Hey look! I just found all the toilet paper. The Facebook Marketplace is loaded.

Antiseptic wipes? Nothing within 40 miles and no one is shipping.

Plenty of first aid kits. Do I want to pay $34 for a few band aids, an ace bandage and the possible dried up bacterial wipe?

Did you know that some people are making their own wipes. They are with lotion, rubbing alcohol and heavy duty paper towels. Genius. So where are they finding the paper towels?

I keep hearing my momma’s voice saying, “Wash your damn hands!”

You know, sometimes you have to just laugh at the situation.

Final thought. Please consider sharing this article with suggestions where you have been successful finding antiseptic wipes. Or put your suggestions in the Comments below. Thanks.

Now I need to go apologize to my boss. Stay safe.

 

 

 

Easter Is Coming

We all know that Easter is coming and signs of Spring are blooming everywhere.

Coming out of the dark and cold of Winter is energizing with the sun shining brighter and the days getting longer.

Yes, we may celebrate Easter with a Reese’s chocolate and peanut butter Easter Bunny. These reminders are woven into our daily lives as soon as the first petals appear on the Cherry Blossoms.


For me though, this time of year is a great time to reflect on the Cross.

What we tend to forget is how we got here and who saved us.

Jesus Christ was anticipating our freedom and our salvation as Easter drew near. He was excited for all of His believers knowing that we were being given the gift of eternal life.

He also wanted to show His love to the entire world so He chose to extend forgiveness and to offer everyone salvation.

He chose a brutal death in a brutal time in history. Why not by “guillotine” or “lethal injection?” Those methods are much quicker and much humane then wearing a crown of thorns and experiencing excruciating beatings, scourging and suffocation.

Luke’s depiction of the crucifixion (http://bit.ly/2VngHXI) captures the agony of the Cross much like The Passion (http://bit.ly/2CZoHa2) does of the scourging Christ took at the hands of the Romans.

The fact that Christ chose to surrender himself to go through this hell is just another example of how much He loves us.


Considering what Jesus went through and how He suffered for us, please remember how He forgave us of our sins, was ridiculed in the process, and surrendered Himself to our Father in Heaven.

And on Easter Sunday morning celebrate His Resurrection because He rose from the dead and today He is alive seated at the right hand of the Father until the day He returns.

Hallelujah.

Glorious Day – Casting Crowns
http://bit.ly/2VvgNMM

Carry My Cross – Third Day
http://bit.ly/2CSu4YL

Forever – Kari Jobe
http://bit.ly/2D1pWpj

GOING DEEP

What is scourging?
http://bit.ly/2CZoHa2

Crucifixion
http://bit.ly/2VkGMGM

How Do We Know That God Has Got Us?

Today we all said goodbye to an awesome man, Chris Bradford.

He was a loving husband, caring and supportive son, and a pioneer among men advocating for victims of intimate partner violence.

I met Chris in July of 2008 when he showed up at a Domestic Violence Speakers Bureau training I was conducting.  He was hungry to learn and had an overflowing passion to support survivors and victims of emotional, verbal and physical abuse.

Chris was one of only a handful of men that showed up and participated whole heartedly in an effort to engage other men in turning the tide of violence against women and girls.

He had courage and determination to make a difference. And he did.  He leaves a legacy and he clearly touched many lives in his short time with us.

The primary challenge for me today is realizing that even being a champion for others, as Chris was, we also have our own struggles. We can advocate and participate in rallies and gain accreditation, but we are alone with our own internal battles to fight.

Chris, at 42, was apparently so consumed in his own fight that he decided he couldn’t win. He forgot for a moment how awesome he was. It is with a heavy heart to say… Chris took his own life. How? We don’t know. It isn’t important.

What is important is we all (especially men) need to learn how to ask for help.

I keep asking myself how I missed the signs that Chris was struggling. We talked at length about how to help men change their behavior, but we never asked each other how we were doing ourselves.

Chris knew how much I appreciated his help, his support and his courage, but I never told him I loved him. And I do love Chris. He is my brother in Christ and I look forward to seeing him again in heaven.

Yes. Chris was a Believer. But like all of us (believer or not) we can become isolated  which is exactly what the enemy wants. His goal is to steal, kill and destroy us.  For me, this is even more reason why we need each other.

Chris didn’t ask for help from anyone that we know of.  Maybe he struggled like every one of us thinking, “I’m a man. I don’t need help.” Maybe he felt he had his life under control and the enemy caught him at a weak moment.

The bottom line is this. We need to be willing to ask for help and we have to be willing to really dig in to get to know our brothers (and sisters).

Every man (and women) has a story.  We live together. We work together. We have church and Bible study together. But do we really know what each other is dealing with when we are left alone?

Whether we are believers in a risen Savior or not, many of us have experienced the enemy’s tactics; making us feel weak, insignificant and alone. This is why it is so important to realize that we are here to help each other.

In the beginning, God created man so He (our Creator) could be in relationship with us. He loves us completely.  He did not design us to be alone, but to love and support one another.

So today I say to each and every one of my family members, my friends, and especially my wife (who I do not tell enough), I love you.

We all need the reminder that we are loved.  Especially on a day like today.

I love how Chris’ wife Dana shared how God showed her His love in the following post a few days after he died.

Yesterday after seeing Chris for the last time, I returned home just before a big thunderstorm. Within 5 minutes of me entering our home, the rain began. My home was full of guests bringing me and my family love and support. I stepped outside on our deck and let God cry on me. I lifted my face and arms to heaven and let Him wash over me. It’s not often that it downpours (this) heavily with rain and thunder and the sun shining (all) at the same time. God and I wept together and I was the most drenched by His tears. (As I stepped back indoors) I was told my face looked different and that was because I was kissed by God and covered in His tears. I stepped back into the rain (for more).

God does love us so much and He does cry with us now as we say goodbye to Chris.

I choose to believe that our God is so awesome that He is now holding Chris. Reminding Chris how awesome he is in God’s eyes.

Going forward let us remember Chris for his pioneer spirit and his awesome heart for others. Chris always put our needs before his own.

Let us also keep Dana and Chris’ family in our daily prayers and consider helping Dana pay for today’s awesome service with a donation to the Fundraiser for Dana Bradford.

How do we know that God has got us? He shows us by revealing His love for each and every one of us… through… each and every one of us.

Chris said it perfectly when he said goodbye. “Be awesome to each other.”

We can all help prevent suicide. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.

If you or someone you know is struggling call 1-800-273-8255